It’s Sunday morning, and your worship service has begun in the usual way. Following an opening prayer, an elderly board member, head bowed, walks slowly to the podium. He nervously fidgets with his microphone, sending crackles throughout the silent room. His index finger flips the screen on his tablet notes. He speaks slowly. “Friends, it is my sad responsibility to announce that our pastor has resigned. After I read his letter of apology, I will ask all of you to pray with me for our pastor and his family. I am sure you will have many questions, but I don’t have a lot of answers. However, your board will schedule some meetings to answer questions. In the meantime, our assistant pastor will temporarily serve as our senior pastor.” You, and most of the congregation, are shocked: What happened? A pastor has fallen.
Why do pastors fall?
The short answer: Pastors fall because they are subject to the same temptations as human beings. There are, of course, a range of failures that we tolerate in most people, including clergy. We put up with occasional outbursts of ill temper, a poorly delivered sermon, miscommunication, and even minor civil offenses like speeding and parking tickets. But we expect pastors to hew to the moral high ground. We expect them to tell the truth about church finances, avoid lavish trips, and avoid drunkenness and all manner of sexual offenses.
What is the scope of the problem?
Perhaps the most serious clergy problems destroying families and congregations are sexual activities, including adultery and sexual abuse. The numbers vary but still represent significant percentages. In 1991, Hadman-Cromwell reported that 6 to 10 percent of clergy have sex violations. Thoburn and Balswick (1998) reported 15.6 percent of seminary students had sex with either a church member or someone they were counseling. The Hartford Institute for Religion (2000) reported that 23 percent of 532 Christian churches dealt with problems due to a pastor’s sexual behavior.
Numbers do not tell the whole story. In reviewing reports from our own research (e.g., Thomas & Sutton, 2008) and that of others, we found that pastor violations are particularly damaging because pastors lead people to God and represent the needs of congregants to God. Clergy failures destroy trust on a grand scale because the church appears no longer as a place of safety and protection and a place where people can seek God. Instead, the church becomes just another place where one must be careful and on guard. The direct-impact victims experience trauma symptoms of anxiety and depression along with disrupted relationships. Some struggle with suicidal feelings and substance abuse.
Who are the victims?
Like the proverbial pebble tossed into a pond, clergy failure has a ripple effect beginning with those closest to them. When pastors lose their employment and moral standing, their families suffer humiliation and economic distress. Church members directly involved with the pastor suffer distress from the damaged relationship. They also experience a disruption in their relationship with God and with other congregants who may blame the victims as well as or in place of the pastor. All of these members may well have a large circle of family and friends who will experience their own set of emotions and will display actions of support or disruption.
What is the role of forgiveness and reconciliation in the restoration process?
Christians are commanded to forgive others, which of course includes a fallen pastor. No one expects this to be easy. But, because forgiveness deals with past events, once achieved, the forgiving person is able to focus on the present and the future; this focus is the key to restoration.
I think it is important here to separate reconciliation from forgiveness and restoration. Forgiveness is an inner process of letting go of an offense. Reconciliation concerns repair of a relationship between a congregant and the pastor. In cases where the pastor is repentant and engaged in a process of change, reconciliation may make sense for the pastor and the offended church member. But restoration is a separate matter. In the case of a fallen pastor, restoration usually means restoring the pastor to a ministry. In such cases, we can expect offended individuals to be more open to restoring pastors if they have forgiven the pastor and begun a process of reconciliation. Wisdom is needed in developing restoration plans. And congregants who desire to see their pastor restored to ministry are advised to seek professional counsel from experienced church leaders.
What else can Christians do to restore a fallen pastor?
Restoration can be a lengthy process. Church leaders normally have support services from their denomination. The following ideas make an important assumption: The pastor is repentant and is willing to submit to an investigation of the problem, an assessment of his needs, and a church- approved restoration plan. He and his family will need significant social, emotional, and economic support; therefore, while the restoration plan is underway, individuals can be involved in reconciliation. Following are some ideas.
- Pray for the pastor and his family.
- Organize a supportive network. Notes, emails, invitations to events, calls, and visits have a place in ensuring that both the pastor and his family know they are not forsaken and there really is redemption for those who lose their way.
- Encourage church leaders to use a comprehensive model to assess the needs of the pastor and his family. For example, Sutton and Thomas (2005) refer to SCOPES, an acronym reminding people to assess Spirituality, Cognition or beliefs, Observable behavior patterns, Physical and health status, Emotional functioning, and Social needs.
- Look for opportunities to meet economic needs. Many churches are strapped for funds. But through an extended network, it may be possible to offer alternative employment during the restoration process.
- Pray for the decision makers that they will have wisdom in meeting the needs of the pastor and his family as well as the needs of the congregation. Many churches split when a senior pastor leaves following a moral failure. The loss of attendance can decimate a church’s budget, putting other staff and activities in jeopardy. Wisdom is needed to help congregants focus on God’s plan for the church and offer the fallen pastor and his family a bridge to wholeness.
References
Greer, C.L. (2009). Violations of the divine: Forgiveness of ingroup transgressors within church congregations of the Christian faith (Thesis).Virginia
Commonwealth University. Retrieved from http://hdl.handle.net/10156/3259
Hadman-Cromwell, Y. C. (1991). “Sexual misconduct by clergy.” Journal of Religious Thought, 48, 64-72.
Hartford Institute for Religious Research. (2002). A quick question: How common is clergy sexual misconduct? Retrieved from Hartford Seminary, Hartford Institute for Religious
Research Web site: http://hirr.hartsem.edu/research/quick question18.html
Thoburn, J. W., & Balswick, J. O. (1998). “Demographic data on extra-marital sexual behavior in the ministry.” Pastoral Psychology, 46, 447–457.
Thomas, E. K., & Sutton, G.W. (2008). “Religious Leadership Failure: Forgiveness, Apology, and Restitution.” Journal of Spirituality in Mental Health, 10, (4).
Ibid, 308-327.
