Most of us know that we can find spiritual refreshment through spending time in silence and solitude. Yet the reality of most of our lives is that of increasing busyness, increasing noise, and so much electronic engagement that we rarely honor our need for solitude. A few strategies I have found helpful include:
Have a sacred space in your home
This can be room or even a particular chair that you use for daily silence and solitude. It is important that this is the sole use for that space so that each time you go there, it is a place of solitude. If you live with others, they can honor the space in the same way. Over time you will find that it helps form this habit in your life.
Schedule weekly time on your calendar
Begin each week by scheduling some intentional time for silence and solitude on your calendar. It can be a short period of time, even just 15 minutes. But do it several times during the week. By scheduling the time you are much less likely to just have the time slip away from you. Then treat it the same way you would any other appointment. Do not succumb to the temptation to let other things occupy that time and if others ask if you are available, tell them you have an appointment (Because you do!)
Go on a Structured Retreat
There are countless places, meditation centers, monasteries, retreat centers that offer structured time for solitude. This can be a wonderful way to get a deep dose of solitude, which I find the supports my weekly practices. There are usually spiritual directors or companions available that can assist you with structuring your time and support your silence. You may be surprised by how connected you can feel with others that are engaged in that same search for solitude and silence.
Use your travel time differently
If you are like me, there is much time in each day that is spent getting from one place to the other. I have found that this can be one of the most sustaining or the most frustrating parts of my life. If I am commuting in my car, I can decide to not turn on the radio, and instead use that time to really embrace silence and center myself for the day. If it is at the end of the day, I can use it to transition from my workplace to home. If I am simply walking to lunch or to a meeting I can use that time to breathe deeply and stop to look at the beauty of my surroundings.
Find a partner to hold you accountable
Find someone who also needs support in developing a practice of silence and solitude. Check in with each other regularly to see how your practice is developing. This is not to be punitive, but mutually supportive. We all know that we are more likely to exercise if we have someone who is going to work out with us on a regular basis. While it may sound counter-intuitive, you can have a support system for your solitude as well. My husband has come to see the many benefits I get from my time in solitude, so will now even suggest I take that time if I seem to be stressed or overwhelmed
Silence and solitude are beautiful gifts we have from the Creator. We are invited to step away for reflection to assess our priorities, and grow in our relationship with God. Life can easily become so frenetic that we miss the grace of this gift. By integrating regular spiritual practices into our lives, we are more likely to grow into a posture that values this time and seeks it intentionally. You will find your other relationships enriched if you take the time to be available to yourself and God as well.
